Day 31

The little things.

I have been trying to hold onto to moments.   Grasp onto them tightly, changes are coming and I want to try to get everything out of this time.

I realized today also how important small deeds are.  Just a smile, or a quick chat.  To take the time to stand for a few extra seconds and hold the door, or to thank someone - really thank them, not the habitual kind.  Someone peeked their head into my studio and made a comment that in that moment changed everything.  My day went from great to grand, it enabled me to sit back, take a deep breath, smile, and be thankful.  Thankful for nothing but the remembrance that I am a part of something that is common, and yet so far out of the ordinary - life.

Done and done

I made the last of the forms today.  I have a lot of them, around 240. (80 big, 160 small).  Now comes the decoration phase.
The idea is that I now go back through all the days of the journal and choose which idea from each day I will symbolize onto the forms I made that day.  So if I was able to make eight forms, those eight forms are decorated with a symbolism pertaining to the idea from that day.

Here is a picture of the two small molds.  They wear their time well.

30

Ahhh....can you hear that, yes that is the sound of freedom (one day to go).

Something really miraculous happened today.   I found myself letting go of my worries and trusting that the universe is a place that is not out to hurt me.  I realized instead that this is a place in which I belong.  This is my home.  I am allowed to feel comfortable, and happy.  Breathing easy is not a bad thing.  I can see that letting go of fear and accepting uncertainty takes a certain courage, and acceptance, but I am so excited to practice my new found faith.
  I think it is really interesting that you can be told about an idea a thousand times, but until you experience it there is really no way to fathom, or understand it.

Twenty 9

Story Time:

A Story - the recounting of a sequence of events.

I have been thinking a lot about how much of the interactions I have are based in a story format. Many times I find myself telling a story, even though I do not always have to finish that story.

For example someone asked me what I was doing today, and I told them that I was playing on my computer. They accepted this answer, but did not delve any further into my story.  

My idea with all of this comes from the layers and layers of information that go into artwork, and more broadly, my life.  The question is will I take the time to investigate those layer to find the meaning and stories I am looking for?

Poem Time

The Bells toll from afar.  I hear their message on the stars.  "awake - go forward to adventure.  Throw off habit, let your ritual die.  Seek the heart's hiding place, and collect your dreams - they litter the floor.  Let them fill your pockets, and throw them from the edge.  Let the abyss swallow them and see that here lie your true dreams - the unknown, the undreamt."


One more that I borrowed a few lines from to create the above:


My dreams are all around.  I see them stuck to the walls.  They litter the ground at my feet, are 
stuffed in my pockets.  They flow from the pen and my lips.  
They are scattered all around.  

28th

Honesty:

I realized that I have had the opportunity to use this project, especially the notebook, as a place of honesty.  A place were I could be truthful to myself.   In some ways I think I am afraid to see were my desires and needs come from, and in other cases I will never know, there are just parts that I cannot understand, and surely do not take the time to.  So what do I do about honesty?  How can I gain the strength to face my needs and longings truthfully, and not be afraid to show them to others?


                                                                                       

Twenty 7

Two things:


1.  I am tired of this project.  I am excited about the work.  I am happy that I am learning so much, but I am physically tired.  I realized today that ideas cannot be forced.  Which is, in my opinion such a weird concept.  The concept that the harder I try to force something the less likely it is to happen.  I felt a little pressure today to think of interesting things, but alas nothing.

2.  I left the studio and went out to dinner with some friends.  Guess what?  Great conversation and a plethora of ideas.  I think for the first time in my life I have formed a real belief that I want to make a solid part of my life.  Some people believe in god, and they really believe.  I have always been so amazed by this  belief because I have never felt such a thing (I am sure I have a lot of ingrained beliefs that I am not identify very well).  Last night I realized that my belief in the universe has to do with balance.
 The most truth I see lies in between the poles.
 The Grey area, it makes so much sense - I love grey.

Six and Twenty

Today I realized how important this process is to my well-being.  The opportunity to sit down everyday and write has become therapeutic.  I am finding that I am so much better able to express myself through writing than in social settings.  How often do you think I talk about my emotions, fears, and hopes during the day?  Not that I could not, but who really wants to hear about how my heart feels, or what I think about god?  

Guess what?  My heart hurts.  I cannot tell if it is a feeling I should be enjoying or if it is pain, but I am trying to enjoy it because it is something different than what I usually feel.

I do not know anything about god, only what others have told me.  When I sit down and look for god I see beauty.  

20 + Five

I found myself sitting in the sun, feet dangling over a concrete wall with no one around.  Long overdue emotions erupted in the form of a vulnerability the likes of which I have not known for a long time.  I was swept back to a time when I was 5 or 6 years old.  I was wearing a green, collared shirt and it was picture day for kindergarten.  Amazing that I was at one time that little man.  I feel like that must have been a different life, or a different world.  That person was vulnerable too.  He had not yet built up the walls.  That version of me was innocent.  There in the sun I saw that person within me - vulnerable and innocent - a child lost in a world that he does not fully understand, and yet he still gets his picture taken none the less.

An Idea about these ideas

 I have been thinking a lot about the ideas that I have been posting.  I realize that they seem a little idealistic. I have also been thinking again about how important it is to surround yourself with the things that you want to be.  I do not mean to be overly utopic, but I do want these notions to be a bigger part of my life, and the best way I see to do that is to talk, think, and write about them.

How exciting is it to think that we have some power in deciding who we can become?

24

Today was just a day.

 No world changing ideas came today.  So many days I am thinking and thinking and today I was just doing, just going along.  I like this very much.  I love thinking a lot too, but the idea of having days to balance those days is so great.    Today I realized that I am not super intellectual, but I do have fun thoughts, and I do like who I am, and I do like when the day is just a day.  I do not need the sky to fall, or any miracles to happen for the day to be amazing.  Amazing as nothing special, how wonderful is that?  

                                                                                    Today was a great day.

Twenty plus 3

Tonight I went to listen to a prominent art historian in Pittsburgh.  A few things of note.

The lecture was held at a certain University.  I was astounded by all the people, diversity, energy, and social happening.  Where WVU is so diffused and spread out, this was condensed like a hive.  I enjoyed the feeling very much.  So much potential.

The talk was really interesting.  After reading James Elkins' books I had imagined him to be super intellectual and a bit stuffy, but he was just the opposite, funny and personable.  He was basically describing the way in which vision works, and he went on to give many examples of different types of vision within nature.  In the end the talk was geared to do two things.  Show just how complex the act of sight is (and in turn just how complex life is), and secondly he discussed how we often do not visually see  things unless we are aware of their existence, or understand them conceptually.

Day Twenty 2

The sun was shining today.  Amazing how life is so different with a little winter time sunshine.

Have you ever forgotten to appreciate the place you live?  I realized during the outdoor, sun catching, adventure I took today that I have.  I realized that I have forgotten to appreciate the beauty of Morgantown, and the surrounding mountains.  I found myself on a great lookout, which enabled me to grasp just how much I was missing, and just how grand this place I am living in is.

Did you ever talk to a foreigner about where they are from with rapt attention, because you are so amazed that they could be from a place so different?   I am going to work hard on adopting the mindset that for someone this place that I live would be that foreign place, and I am going to try to appreciate it for its uniqueness, even if I sometimes feel that it is just my normal place.

I was thinking about maps of the area for the decoration.

two one

You know that time right before you wake up?  I mean really wake up?  I love that time.

This morning on the trip back from my dreams I was thinking about the sheer magnificence of the brain, and all the things that must happen in order for vision, hearing, and the senses to take place, not to mention all the other things that are going on inside of us.

I then realized why I like thoughts like these.  They help me to be more grateful.  If I appreciate all the wonderful things that I have, I do not need to want so much more.  I do not want to follow societies ideas of success, and yet I know I do, and will continue to.  But if every once in a while I remember just how sweet it is that my eyebrows are perfect just like they are, maybe I can be a little happier.

Twenty

I must admit I love the weekends.  I like the weekdays too, but the weekends are so quiet.  Tonight I went for an evening stroll.  There was hardly anyone around and the city lights, with the snow was really beautiful.  I was thinking about how hard it is for me to explain my feelings when my mind is so calm, and I realized that maybe part of the reason that it is such a great place is because it cannot be described.  The idea that we all have this secret world within that we cannot explain or share with others is, in my opinion, wonderful.  I also think it is wonderful to still try.

Day Nineteen

Today has been a good one.  We are receiving snow, so the world is all beautiful and new.

I went and bought groceries today before school, and was stuck in traffic for a bit.  I have an aversion to traffic, as I am sure most people do.  During my angst I realized that I am always wishing that I was able to set aside more time for slowing myself down.  

 I realized I could put my being stuck in traffic to use, so I relaxed, took a deep breath, and then saw, to my amazement all the beauty that I had not noticed in my state of hurry.  Tomorrow I think I might drive around town just looking for some traffic to get stuck in.

I was also thinking today about how this project is in some ways based on the idea of me expressing my everyday occurrences through artistic expression.  I am happy about this because I have always felt that the processes of getting to an artistic object often leaves behind a trail of artistic residue that no one ever sees but the artist.  Finding a way to share that with people, or realizing that it is happening is fulfilling.

For the last few days, including today, I have not figured out what the surface of those forms will be.  I gave the job to my subconscious to work on.

One eight

I must admit that this project is becoming ever increasingly difficult as more and more duties present themselves.

Today was not the most productive in the studio, but in taking my own advice from yesterday I escaped my routine, and tried to boost my brain function by getting out.  I had dinner with friends and the conversation was deep enough with plenty of laughs.  I also met a girl that made my heart beat a little faster than normal.  I find it amazing that as we meet so many people there are a certain few that, for whatever reason, just feel right.
Meditating on this idea leads me to be amazed (like a thousand times before) at the complexity and wonder of this whole thing.  How fun to be challenged, intrigued, and human.

Day 17

Tonight I had a nice conversation with a few friends about a phenomenon I had heard about.  The story went that neurologists compared the brains of wild and zoo kept gorillas, and found that the wild gorillas (those still living in their natural habitats) had sufficiently higher amounts of neurological connectors in the brain.  In short these animals were smarter.  the difference is due to the amount of stimuli that wild gorillas face.

This led us to discuss the idea of putting oneself in situations that challenge or vary in comparison to ones own "norm" in order to enable the brain to stay flexible, and sharp.  This led me to think about how difference seems to be based highly on perception.  When and if my mind is in the right place nothing ever looks the same, and each perception seems wholly new and unique no matter my environment.

How will I depict this symbolically?  Maybe I can find some new way of going about it to spark fresh connectors.

Sixteen

Today a fellow student came into my studio and we talked a bit about my work.  He gave me the idea of trying to use the forms to interact with my fellow students.  

So the idea is that I will find 4 volunteers from around the studio who are willing to take an hour or so to teach me.  I will take two forms into their studio.  One for them and one for me.  They will teach me about their favorite, or much used decoration technique.  The possibility of interacting with my fellows in a new and different way is inciting.

Ultimately the notion of the way in which those around us influence who we are and become.

5 + 5 +5 =

Some days this is much harder than others.  For example yesterday I was brimming with things to say, and today I feel like I am brimming with the same things to say.  I read a book today on the philosopher Hume, and was so impressed.  His writings are basically notions of the same things that I have been postulating for a bit here, but he is even more dramatic.  Hume would have us question our entire mode of thought and of being.

I like this idea so much.  Of course in practice there are certain things we must adhere to, but how much simpler is life if we try and understand that our modes of "knowledge" are ever changing, and based only on other forms of "knowledge."  In other words how do we define the words that define the words?  For me at least it is a little easier to sign in relief with the understanding that everything that is bothering me, or worrying me is a mental construct.

Today was also fun because the journal took a bit of a beating, and today's page looks super weathered and haggard.  I have been using red clay, because it is readily available in our clay room, and needs to be recycled.  I like using it, but it seems to get everywhere.

4 Teen

I am going to call today philosophy day.  I finished some Freud readings, and so my mind was spinning with possibilities.  Without going into too much detail about the book let me say that I think Freud had a preoccupation with sex, and that his theories were way farther out there than I understood prior.  The one idea I came away with is that we all have to possibility to create our own way.  The thing about people like Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed, and even Freud is that they struck their own pathways, and did it in such a self assured way that people just went with what they claimed.  I think we should all strive to be just like this.  To find our own way, to see the universe as a place of possibility and try our best to find our own meanings.

With this in mind I was thinking about the painting Black Square, by Kazmir Malevich.  The painting represents the ideas of possibility, and infinity.

During the times when I shake off all I have been told or think the universe is, life surprises me with its limitlessness.

Lucky 13

Memories.

I would imagine that most people have an aesthetic appreciation for deteriorated objects that have worn away by time and use.  We all love our jeans that have been worn so many times that the material is soft, each stain and hole has a story, and they fit just right.  Time has worn away the stiffness.  All the hard edges have been blunted through use and love.

Tonight I recalled a memory that I am not sure if I have ever revisited from when I was probably 4 or 5 years old.

"The older the memories are, and the less we have visited them, the better they become, much like wine"
Jack Kerouac

This memory was especially sweet.  I remember playing under the table, and I catch glimpses from the whole scene.  There is something about the memory that is especially interesting though, it is only sweet.  I have no negative feelings at all.  In fact it is nothing but bright and fuzzy, like my old jeans.  I have a feeling that as life passes away all the negative, bad stuff gets put in the boxes at the bottom of our memories, all the others are moved to the top, and become soft woolly blankets, just waiting to wrap us up.

twelve

today was all over the place, I am a bit tired.  The project is so much work, and I have only begun to do the formal research.

A quote I heard once went something like this.

You have not even begun to make progress until you get to the point that you are fatigued.

(it is not exact, but it was from a trainer of Lance Armstrong)

If we know that our surrounding environment shapes who we are why should we not surround ourselves with only things that inspire us, that we love, and long to be?

My new task is figuring out how to portray the unconscious side of my learning, or deciding if I really want to.  In a metaphoric way I was thinking that the space inside the box could be considered the unconscious, because I do not know what is in there, it is unknowable, as is the unconscious.  The analytic mind conceals the unconscious, and yet we know that things are not only what they seem.

To break down this barrier in the pieces I was thinking about how I can reveal the inside of form aesthetically.                                  

Also I recently obtained a 3-d rendering program for my computer.  I had so much fun and became so frustrated trying to create this rendition of the forms I am using (tutorials here I come).

Eleven

I have been waking earlier than usual for school, and I really love the mornings.  The bed is so mellow in the pre dawn.  The sky was such a calm blue, and the clouds wore just a hint of orange and pink.  I love my bed, I love sleeping, and I love waking.  So fun.

So today was Color.  For me consciously thinking about color is quite amazing.  The world is a different.  Most of the time I do not see color really, it is just a part, but when I give attention - what a phenomenon.  Life takes on new meaning, and new clarity with color.  No white is just white, no blue, blue. They become emotion, they become holders of memory.

A little tangent:
I would have to say that this project is making my life better.   I have been noticing the preposterousness of of actually trying to analyze experiences.  There are so many things happening in a moment.  All the senses, the complexity of the entire human being, and all the information in an environment.  This really gets me to thinking about unconscious learning, and what that means.

The Ten

Mediocrity,

My thoughts today followed the ideas of enjoyment.  More specifically how to enjoy life. When I look around at all the things we have, all the opportunities, and yet people are still sad.  We let stress overtake us, and forget to see life as a joke, as miraculous, as outlandishly, absurdly, funny. 

  I wonder how we lose ourselves so wholly that we take life so seriously.  I witnessed a man in the market who was really sad, he forgot to see the cashier, he forgot to thank her, he forgot to smile, he forgot to look, see, hear, and he forgot how to laugh.  I then realized that we are not happy if we have the right clothes, or car, or other material goods.  We are not happy with the right job, or spouse, or kids.  We are happy with ourselves.  I am happy with myself.  Not because of anything I can do, but for the fact that I get to do it.  

a sneak

I emptied a bisque kiln today.

here is a preview of what I think the piece will kind of look like.  This is just a few of the small pieces put together.

n i n e

Today was quiet,

literally I woke up in a quiet mood and thought and listened to the quiet all day.  Well that is not entirely true, but I will admit that when I tried to here the quiet I ended up being much more attentive on my present situation.  The thing that I love about this project is that if I am thinking about what quiet is and how to visually represent that it really does have an impact on my experiences.

The times when I listen for quiet my life is much more quiet.  For me quiet is calm, quiet is more tranquil, and therefore quiet is happier.

I heard quiet in noise, and quiet in the crowd.

I saw quiet as the spaces between the letters, and the expanse around people.  I heard art today better than ever. I could see it, and listen too.

podcasts

these are my favorite podcast right now.  If you have not listen to any of these they are all pretty great, and if you have a favorite that is not on here give me shout.

This American Life
Radiolab
The Moth
Transom
Ted Talks
99% Invisible
How to do Everything
Alan Watts
Freakonomics

Enjoy

8

While I work I listen to radio shows.  If you have not looked into podcasts I suggest you do.  I will add a little list onto this of my favorites.

Today I was listening to a story podcast and some of the stories were about joy and some hardship.  There is something about hearing peoples stories that really touches me.  The stories I found myself most touched by were the ones based on hardship, because I feel like my life is so padded right now.

I do believe that a lot of times suffering is self inflicted, but all too often I fear it is not.  This is what I cannot understand.  I cannot understand why we are so cruel to one another.  We are really great, do not get me wrong, but sometimes human beings are cruel, hateful, and just plain mean.

After thinking it over it seems to be a part of our nature.  I see this part in people, and in myself that is out of control.  Somehow we keep doing things that are noticeably not very wise, and yet it seems like we have no way to stop doing them.  We know that war is terrible, we know that smoking is very harmful, that processed food is lethal, that people are starving, that debt can be taken too far, and yet we just cannot seem to stop ourselves.  Human beings are complicated, and in some ways cannot govern themselves.

Today the surface is all about uncontrolled chaos.  This image of ceramic artist Catherine Taylor's work speaks to the chaos that I am imagining.

On the seventh day

Meaning

I looked out my window and realized that if possible I would have been happy laying in bed staring at the clouds all day.  Nature is all the things that I want to be, it is quiet (occasional outburst aside), humble, beautiful, intelligent, and eternal.  Once I realize that I am nature I breath a little deeper.  Knowing that I am what I want to be that it is my default position, well...hooray.

This type of thinking moves me next onto the idea of meaning.  For what are we trying to do with our lives except create and understand the meaning of that life?   I believe that life is meaningless.  I do not mean that in a pessimistic way.  Let me quote the philosopher Alan Watts here to explain, "The reason for dancing is not to arrive at a particular spot on the floor.  The reason for music is not to get to a certain point in the music, in that case the best musicians would be the fastest, and the best dancers the quickest."  Maybe I should say that I do not believe that life has a purpose.  I believe that the purpose of life is life, to just be it, and do it.

Once I arrive at this point I realize that if I want life to have a purpose I can choose one that I think will in some way help me be alive more fully.  Really I think the reason for life having meaning is to help us realize life more fully.  So choose a meaning that gets your heart pumping, or decreasing if that is what you are into.

With meaning in mind I am going to get crazy on today's forms.  I am going to use a variety of surface treatments, like glaze, underglaze decals and whatnot to create a surface that uses a vast amount of details to create a larger possibility of meaning for myself and the viewer.

Day 6

I ran into the problem today of acting on impulses that gave rise to me being a person that I am not particularly proud of.  I will not get into the particulars, but it made me think about opposites, and the way in which we have such different poles within us.  The possibility of love and hate sum it up pretty well in this case.

I came to a conclusion that goes back to what I have been thinking about in terms of acceptance.  The idea is based on understanding  that we have a mixture of potentials within.  Understanding that they exist is easy, but accepting them is not.  We are bombarded through cultural ideas with how we should act, and think.  How do we go about trying to abolish one personality trait when we understand that it is necessary for the existence of its opposite?  How can I be upset when I hate, when I am so proud of myself when I love?  Is it possible that I could only love?  

I like this question because I think it plays on society at large very easily.  As a society we are trying to abolish one end of the spectrum, and yet when we examine the universe we see that both poles are necessary for life to exist.

I was also looking at the work of Jun Kaneko today and so with the above in mind and his work I am going to do some black and white stripes on today's forms.

Day the fifth

Today was a good one.

In academia the analytical knowledge reigns supreme.  There is little room for intuition.

 There is so much pressure in grad school to be theoretic and logically analytical that as an artist it is sometimes difficult because there are things that do not need to be explained, that are better because you do not need to over analyze them, having faith and just "knowing" are enough.

My friend Morgan has this great saying: "I like what I like, because I like it."

Today I am trusting my gut.  I am going to finish today's forms with matte, muted colors of my choice.  Why?  Because I think single, opaque colors can be beautiful, and express a lot of emotion, even if I do not want to talk about, or understand why.

(Do not get me wrong, I know there is much to be gained from understanding ones decisions, hence this project, but I also think that sometimes just liking it is enough.)  I also think that trusting yourself, and doing what you really like, especially those things that make you happy, is important.  

Day Four

On my way to school today I saw a grown man bend, make a snowball and playfully throw it at his friend. This started me thinking about play in our lives.  Why I wonder is it acceptable to call what children do as they run around play, and what most adults do everyday serious business.  I feel like if we looked at our actions a little looser we would see just how much we play....even though we play so seriously.

Play: engage in activity for enjoyment and recreation rather than a serious or practical purpose: 

Even though we take our actions very seriously if we look at them more closely it becomes apparent that their importance is a figment of the imagination.

Todays design borrows from children's blocks that have numbers and letters on them.  I chose this design because within those blocks resides the opportunity for both play and the ever serious learning.

Day Three

Today is all nature.

I walked to school, because the snow and cold made me think twice about driving, or riding.  On the way I came across this beautiful section of wind eroded snow.  I love this beauty that comes from the chaotic forces of nature, mess that is never a mess.

During the day I listened to a show on NPR entitled Being.  The show hosted five different theologians, including the Dalai Lama, conversing on the nature of happiness.  If you are interested in listening to the show check it out at: http://www.elabs7.com/ct.html?rtr=on&s=fj6,tymq,dv,m7hd,5r4g,mdex,cd0y
One idea that caught my attention dealt with happiness being found by seeing beauty in nature.  This inner understanding can then be translated to this same beauty and happiness being found in our everyday lives.

With this in mind I am going to fire the forms for today in an atmospheric kiln, most likely salt or soda.  In ceramics there is a long tradition of giving over some of the artistic control to the chance of a kiln, such as wood, salt, or soda.

This same idea is linked to the DADA way of thinking.  In the DADA movement artists were interested in letting the subconscious and imagination have a say in the way that art was created.  I find it interesting that I am trying to do the opposite.  I am trying to take experiences that are ephemeral by nature, capture them, and consciously analyze them.

Side Note

To clarify the notebook is the real documentation tool.  I really enjoy the way in which it can be so patch worked, and I think there is something beautiful about how much life can be put into a journal.  They wear time so well with ink splotches, different ideas, some being spelled out very neatly others scribbled in haste, glued in photos, and in the end they gain a life of their own.  This is the part of art that we seldom see.  So much goes into the creation of art, but in the end only the objects are shown.  This project is a way for me to show more of my though process, and the art that happens while creating art.  

Also here is a photo that documents the process of creating the forms a little.  I use press molds, with all different types of clay.  The bigger molds need to sit for a while so the clay hardens up a little more, but the little ones are really fast.  I could probably make a large number of forms in one day, but it is hard work to push all the clay in and then clean up the forms when they come out of the mold, and so I have been making 2 of the bigger forms and 4 of the smaller each day.

Day Two

Last night I went for a 2am jog around my neighborhood ( I was inside most of the day and was longing for a bit of fresh air).  During the run I had so much fun.  The stars were out and beautiful, the air was crisp, and my iPod seemed to know exactly what to play.

Today was the first real snow of the year.  I tucked all that beauty way down in my pockets, to save for this project.

I also had a this remembrance of a game my brother taught me when we were kids.  The game was a type of automatic drawing where you draw a continuous line all over the page with overlaps and loops ect.  Then with different color crayons we would color in all of the shapes that had been created (my brother was always in the lines, I was a bit erratic).  

So the idea for todays symbolism is to automatic draw all over forms that are black in color and then fill in the shapes with white to reference both space/stars and dark sky/snowflakes.  

Until tomorrow.

Day One

   

Okay back to the day.  Funny how it seems to relevant to pay particular attention to the occurrences of now, and not even worry about what happened earlier.

This morning my bike chain fell off, it rained, I listened to the radio, press moleded a bunch of clay forms, did carpentry work, cooked great food, and fixed my bike chain (this is going to be such a strange project).

In all seriousness, today January 1st I learned  that in 2010 and 2011 as many American soldiers committed suicide as died in combat.  Now I do not aim to be overly political, but this just astounded me.  To try and understand how terrible war is in terms of deadliness is one thing, but very few times have I given thought to how traumatic it is mentally.  I learned this from the Smiley and West broadcast on NPR, which is a show hosted by Tavis Smiley and Cornel West.

I in no way want to diminish the tragedy of such events by trying to relate them to me, but as this project is about introspection I have an idea about how to symbolize this notion.  I am going to hand write on the forms all the feelings and emotions that I think would make me consider committing suicide.  With this in mind though, I think it would be equally as meaningful for me to also write the things that I live for, because I do not want to only think about the things in this world that make me sad.

Until tomorrow.

Ground Rules:

Here are the project ground rules:

- Everyday at 9:30pm during the month of January 2012 I will sit down and journal on the experiences and insights and of the day.

- From these I will choose something that I found to be of the utmost importance, and figure out how I can represent that something symbolically.

- During the month I will also create press molded ceramic forms that will be bear the symbolic representation of the important happening.

- I will also each day visit this blog and upload some type of information as documentation of documentation.

(The list is unfinished, but some other questions still need to be worked out before I can answer them, for example).

How many forms will represent the days event, and why?

Proposition

     The idea is that I will document what I see as the most thought provoking experience throughout my day for the month of January 2012.  Each of these 31 experiences will then be used to create a symbolic pattern that will decorate a modularistic ceramic form.  At the end of the 31 days the forms will be put together to create a sculpture that metaphorically represents the way in which my character was formed in January.
   This blog will act as catalytic documentation to the documentation of my visual thesis, in hopes that it will lead to insights and clarity, as well as a way for me to share my daily happenings (especially because I am still not a Facebooker).
   I welcome comments, concerns, and questions.